Roots

I just closed a browser tab on a church in Memphis I visited while I was there with FCA. The next two will be of job listings in Memphis.

I turned down a job interview a few months ago as an engineer in orthopaedic device design at one of the largest of such companies in the country – in Memphis. A city I grew to love very deeply in a very short time. There are actually two major medical device design facilities nearby. I can now find at least half a dozen job postings I qualify for on both websites that would be exactly what I hope to be doing as a career one day soon.

And I am not moving to Memphis.

I think I say that more for my confidence in it than for anyone else’s information. If you know me well, you know I’m intentionally digging in roots here. I need a phase of life that is not transient. Where I can learn consistency and long-term dedication and devotion. Sure, college was four years of being in the same spot, the same phase – but it was also one of the most wholly transitional times of my life. The most consistent thing was living in the same apartment for (almost) two years.

There is a (hopefully dying) part of my pride that recoils every time I have to tell someone I am STILL living in my hometown. Not working in the career field I have a passion for. Not feeling like I am changing anyone’s life with my 9-5, even though I have pretty good experience with that feeling and could even take THAT job again (if I wanted to move 1500 miles away). But there is a growing humility in the fact that I am thrilled to be exactly where I am, and I chose this.

I chose my family, because for right now we are all in the same place and it will not always be this way. I chose my job, because with all of its imperfections I find so much joy in the people and the opportunities I have to be helpful and kind in a corporate culture of stress and selfishness. I chose a few close friendships that have developed out of older, more casual friendships that I really don’t think I could give up now. I chose to be molded into the family of Radius to learn from those who have done very well what I am called to do well in my future and to develop a mature dependence upon the living God with others who also desire to be disciples. I chose my roommate, because she makes my heart happy and only has a short amount of time to be here and enjoy MY city before she moves on. I chose my mentee – I don’t even know her yet and I love her (January, get here faster!).

I chose my city. Because I love Memphis, but it is not my city yet. My heart is here. I am being trained here. I walk the streets of downtown sometimes to ask God how I can see it more and more the way he does. Love it more.

I need the roots to remind me on mornings like this one that one day, I might be released to go. But not today.